Early Start

A few months ago I contacted Early Start because I felt Levi wasn't talking as well as he should be.  He's very difficult to understand and I'm always translating for him.  They finally came out this week to do a full evaluation on him.  Now that he has diabetes, I feel like I need to get him talking!  I need to know if he doesn't feel well or if his tummy aches.  They tested him for over an hour and he does qualify for services.  It's kind of a mixed feeling.  On one hand, I'm glad he will get the help that he needs.  But on the otherhand, he needed to be in the bottom 33% to qualify so I wish he wasn't. 
I wish I could just hug him and hold him tight.  I wish diabetes never came into our lives.  I wish he didn't need speech therapy.  It's just one more thing that takes away from his play time.  He is such a happy little guy.  Don't you wish you could just wave your magic wand and make it all better?

Yesterday Levi's numbers were all over the board.  I'm learning that I need to be much better at counting carbs.  I counted his carbs with dinner and then gave him his shot.  My older son had cub scouts last night and I needed to provide cookies for the meeting.  I couldn't not give one to Levi!  And I didn't have the heart to give him another shot.  At bedtime his numbers were in the 300s.  I realized that I need to be stronger.  That's an area I'm clearly struggling with.  Shots are still so traumatic for us.  He cries so hard and I have to hold him down.  I finally got off my arse and filled out the pump paperwork and sent it to Medtronic.  I might as well start the ball going.

I feel so behind on everything.  Things are slipping through the cracks.  I haven't been working with my kinder on his work, we haven't been doing all the fun xmas stuff and in general, I feel like diabetes has taken over our life.  Maybe my new year's resolution will be to take our life back.